zomgpwn!

ZOMG we've been busy.

We are about to move our offices to some shiny new digs, right between the Anonymous suite and a Scientology reading room - so things should be interesting!  We'll try and keep the peace but no promises... 

ZOMGPWN! promises to update as much as possible over the next few days but don't send us your whiny, crying emails about how you can't live without us and how can we do this to you and blah, blah, blah.

OK so we don't get any emails.  Still, don't start with us, chachi.

Here are the things catching our eyes and ears in the past few days, all wrap-up stylee for you.

Qtrax finally launched. (lulz).  If you don't wanna wait to get yours, just use ours!

http://qtrax-cdod-r1.vitalstreamcdn.com/Player/Qtrax_0.2beta_windows-i686.exe 

Anonymous continues the assault on CruiseCo.  Will something momentous happen on February 10th?
Maybe, maybe not.  It'll be fun to watch though.

The E.U. smacks MAFIAA in the chops.

Paul McGuinness is even stupider and/or greedy than we ever gave him credit for.  Better get a day job, Paulie boy.  It's gonna be a long, tough road for ya laddie.

Jerry Yang breaks the glass due to emergency drop in stock price, wields ax threateningly at anyone who comes too close.

Apple is the most hated company on the nettorz?!  Really?  What about puppyabuser.net or doodiepuke.fm?  No?  Well, we have to say that Mitch Wagner over at Information Week makes some very salient and reasoned points in his recent story on this very topic.  Kudos, Mitch.

Speaking of which, we have a box of Snickers Kudos* that we stole out of someone's car in a Ralph's parking lot. This would be the perfect time to enjoy our ill-gotten chocolate covered granola bars.

(*This post has been a paid for by Mars Inc.  Copyright 2008.  All rights reserved, bitches!)

We're back, baby...

...and this time there's no stopping us.

So, where did we go?  Well it's like this, see...

In ought six, our Managing Editor decided that a company retreat to somewhere super special would be just the bonding experience all us writers/staffers needed to form up a cohesive unit.   Not looking up from our TiVo'd episode of Cheaters.. we grumbled that we could possibly be amenable to that suggestion, as long as there was some sort of alcohol and/or warm weather involved.

To our surprise, he one-upped us by offering a trip to Guatemala where we would convene with a local shaman and ingest a hearty, mind altering substance that's produced from a giant vine of some sort.

We again reiterated our demand for beer and warm breezes.  He relented with a compromise.  First beer, then a chemically induced spiritual journey right after.  This was right at the best part of the Cheaters ep where a guy is getting tazered in a parking lot so we probably just said yes to make him go back in his office and leave us to our mind rot.  Contrary to public opinion, hindsight is usually more like 20/60.. at best.

A week later we found ourselves in the middle of a jungle, surrounded by the amazingly nice and receptive native residents who wore what looked to us like reject duds from Apocalypto, but dang it them peeple wuz pretty smrt.  One of the younger guys even helped us iron out some kinks in our JS queries, WHILE he was skinning our dinner.  Not too shabby.

To make a long story slightly less long, we ended up tripping our asses off on that crazy jungle vine juice and all followed our spirit guides off in different directions.   The details after that are blurry, but most of us eventually ended up back in civilization, with the exception of our Sys Admin.  He's currently acting as the God-King of an agrarian society in rural Honduras and has changed his name to El Grande Guapo de la Jefe.  We're pretty sure he's being ironic, but since he has invented his own language called "Guapish" it's very hard to understand him when he IMs us.

Anyway, now that we've all come down and are back in the office - we've had a chance to clear the TiVo queue, lay down a fresh coat of paint and become mildly interested in what's happening with the `netz these days, we figured we might as well get back into the swing of things.

 

ZOMGPWN! will be updating regularly now, as well as redesigning and relaunching this year.

Pass it on.

Or... don't.  Honestly we're not too invested so it won't break out hearts if you phail to care.  We didn't care about you first, after all.